10 tips for being a great car nurse

We've had our fair share of car trouble over the years.  If I didn't know any better, I might say that Tim actually likes fixing the car.  Sometimes.

We've had a pretty major issue lately-- the clutch slave cylinder went out.  For those of you who maybe aren't familiar with car-speak, this is a transmission issue.  You know that's bad, right?

The process of trying to fix it has been grueling.  In fact, Tim says this is the worst car work he's ever done... at least that he hasn't totally erased from memory.  And this is a guy who put a new engine in his '86 mustang, and replaced the timing belt on two different cars.

This particular fix involved maneuvering a part in very close quarters, while not being able to see what you are doing.

Enter, the Car Nurse.

Over the 8 years Tim and I have been together, I've had a lot of "clinical experience" in the car nursing department.  So, in the hours I've spent hunched over the engine bay with a flashlight this week, I've had a little bit of time to think about what makes a really great car nurse.  And I thought that I would pass some of this information along to you.

You never know... it could save a life.  Or a marriage.  Or a friendship. Just sayin'.

Obligatory Disclaimer:  Neither Big Time Timmy Jim (BTTJ) nor I are certified car mechanics.  Or medical doctors.  Or nurses (yet!).  This list is not comprehensive, it is just what I have learned works for us.  Always consult your own car doctor before attempting to assist with any repairs.
Also, I refer to The Doctor as "he" throughout-- this is not because only boys can work on cars.  It could be girls.  It's just that in our particular garage the doctor is a man.

10 Tips for Being a Great Car Nurse

1) In the wise words of Pinterest: Get Up.  Dress Up.  Show Up.

You may not want to leave the warmth and comfort of your own home... but neither does your Car Doctor.  And he's doing a good thing.  So go and support him.  Yes, you may have a million other things to do, but you also need a working car.  So pull on your long-johns and wool socks, and get your butt  out to the garage and help.  You will also want gloves.  Bonus points if your sweatshirt says "Kiss Me, I'm English."

2)  Know your tools.

I'm not saying you need to know what each and every thing is before, but a huge portion of your job as a car nurse is handing tools to The Doctor.  It helps to be able to find what he's asking for.  Keep in mind you may have different terms for different tools.  What I grew up believing was a flat-head screwdriver, BTTJ refers to as a "regular" screw driver.

3) Keep your mouth shut.

Because you have bad breath.  Also, no one likes a mouth-breather*.
But seriously, folks.  This is NOT the time for small talk or chit-chat.  Don't try to keep the mood light-- there are far more powerful forces affecting the mood, and your talking can either hurt or hurt.

Do not speak unless spoken to.

*I don't know why someone would be bothered by a mouth-breather, its just something a read in a book one time, and it struck me as strange and stuck with me.  I would actually prefer mouth breathers to people who breath really loudly through their nose.  But that has not bearing on this conversation whatsoever.

4) Don't drop the flashlight.

I don't know if I ever have dropped the flashlight (I probably blocked it from my memory), but I just know that that is about the worst thing a Car Nurse could do.  I have spent hours this week saying to myself  "Don't drop the flashlight.  That would be so bad.  Don't drop the flashlight, Steph.  Whatever you do, don't drop the flashlight."

Of course I was saying this all in my head (see #3).

5) Communicate clearly.

I know you might feel like this goes against everything I taught you in #3, but I said do not speak unless spoken to. When you are asked a question you need to reply quickly and accurately. And audibly. When The Doctor asks ''Which way does it need to go?'', ''Toward me'' is not a sufficient reply. Which part needs to move? And does ''Toward me'' mean ''Up'' or does it mean ''Southeast?''  ''Move the back of it toward the rear passenger side" is a much more helpful direction.

6) Emotionally regulate.

I cannot emphasize this enough. The Doctor may start to seem a bit short with you. He's just trying to get something done. He may seem sort of angry. He isn't mad at you (unless you ignore #3 or #4...then he's probably mad at you), he's just mad at the car. And the tools. And The System. (I ain't gonna be part of this system!)

7) Anticipate

Ideally, the more experience you have in car nursing, the better you will get at this.  So far, that's not workin' out for me.  But it doesn't have to be much.  Just have paper-towels and gloves at the ready.  Also, use what you do know.  When The Doctor grabs the tire and starts putting it back on, get the torque wrench, and stand nearby with the lug nuts in hand.

8) Work for a good doctor

A HUGE part of the reason I can (sort of) follow rule #3 is because I know that BTTJ is very, very skilled at what he is doing.  Not only does he have the knowledge and problem-solving skills to do a job, but he has AMAZING intuition when it comes to mechanics.  He knows when to push, and when to back off.  I don't have to talk, because I totally trust him--I'm not even going to question him, because he is so very competent.  

9) Keep the dogburts out of the garage.

You and The Doctor have enough to keep an eye on and worry about without Tico trying to jump up on the car, Toby licking everything in sight, and Jynx trying to tear the garage down, bit by bit.

They may be cute, but they are not helpful.  Just keep them in the house so they're not outside barking incessantly at their frenemy across the street.

10) Always try to learn.

I'm not saying you should ask a million questions (see #3), and DEFINITELY avoid "Is it supposed to do that?" But if The Doctor tries to explain, then listen.  And really try to understand.  Its not over your head-- you can get it.  And if it is over your head, then the more often you hear it, the more familiar it should become, and eventually you will get it.  

As I said, this list is by no means comprehensive, but many of these have been very crucial in our car doctor and nurse relationship.  If you know someone that helps someone work on cars, feel free to share this with them.

If you are a fellow car nurse, or if you are a car doctor, please chime in on what I missed.  What do you find helpful?

All in all, I am so, so, SO grateful to have such a talented husband who has saved us literally thousands of dollars by being willing to roll up his sleeves, get his hands dirty, and risk life and limb to keep things running around here.  

BTTJ- you're amazing.