Real Life with the Taylors: Overwhelmed

I have had people tell me that I am a calm, laid-back person.  I laugh.

If I ever seem to have it all together, please know that this is not the case...ever.  I can just present well.  When everyone else is losing their minds and things are getting chaotic, I can usually keep it together and be some kind of a calming influence.  But you have no idea what is going on inside my head.

If you think I am relaxed and laid-back... rub my shoulders sometime.  No, seriously... I would love that.  I may not always display tension, but I internalize it in a major kind of way.  I have knots in my shoulders like rocks.  I clench my jaw and have to sleep with a mouth guard, and chew gum during the day.  I take acid-reducers.  I'm 28, and I'm on acid reducers.

What I'm getting at is this:  Every single day I am overwhelmed.  Completely and totally overwhelmed. Usually I can still function, but sometimes I just shut down.  

I get overwhelmed by housework, very very easily (as you have seen from the pictures of my house!).  But I know that this is just because I have the blessing of a house and lots of things that enrich my life.

Planning and cooking meals gets overwhelming.  But it is a blessing to do it, and I enjoy it.

Dogburts... totally overwhelming.  Their training and behavior is more than I can take on.  But it's also overwhelming how much they love me.

Work...overwhelming.  Coworkers...definitely overwhelming.  Why do people think I can always solve their problem and expect me to do so?  More importantly, why do I have an overwhelming sense of duty to oblige, thus perpetuating the cycle?  But my coworkers have been an incredible blessing to me as well.

It is overwhelming to have family spread all over the country, and to want so badly to be close to them and spend time with them an support them, but know that you can't be in 5 places at once.  But it is overwhelming to realize how much I am loved and supported, even though they are far away.  I know that my family is one of God's love-letters to me.  Thank you, Lord!

And then there are friends.  I am overwhelmed with friends.  This might sound snobby to say but... I have more friends than I know what to do with!  I am so thankful for each and every one of them, and I just wish that I had time to spend with them individually, as well as have time for myself and for Tim.  And my family.  And my dogs.  There are just not enough hours in a day.  But really what overwhelms me about my friends is that they give me so much, and enrich my life in so many ways, and support me so much... I can never come close to repaying them.  I am so overwhelmed by how they have blessed me... I can't come anywhere close to returning that blessing.

So I guess what I'm saying is, I am totally overwhelmed every day by the blessings that God has given my.  My prayer each night is that He will help me take care of them and cherish them to the fullest extent possible.

Today in Sunday school we were sharing our favorite Bible verses.  One of my 7th graders shared this:

"Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
    or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
    or weighed the mountains on the scales
    and the hills in a balance?"

Isaiah 40:12

If God can mark off the heavens with the breadth of his hand, I think He can help me manage my blessings.  Just as He shows me His love by showering me with blessings, I trust that He will also help me to enjoy them all.

If there is one thing I should be overwhelmed with, it is His love for me.